The first time you have sex with someone can be a little awkward, no matter how comfortable you are. Whether it is the first date or the fiftieth sex is an inevitable element to dating and relationships. You can plan all you want but there is a chance the first time you end up having sex with your date could be in the back of a car or in a pool late at night. Sex happens in all different circumstances. Dreaming of a romantic hotel romance with satin sheets and chocolate covered strawberries is not a bad idea at all but sometimes you are just on the ferris wheel making out and one thing leads to another and you both decide the time is right. Lustful and impulsive but if you have an itch you can’t always wait until you are in a bedroom with candles to scratch it.
With all of that being said, I have compiled a list of the seven most awkward spots that individuals have had sex for the first time in their relationships. Some are obscure and some are clearly not so romantic but all in all they are comical and make for a fun story to tell your friends about the first time you did it! Who knew it would turn into such an event?
The 7 Most Awkward Places To Have Sex For The First Time In A Relationship
Back Seat Of A Car
Every movie, book, and magazine talks about car sex. Unless you are in a stretch limo with a bed inside things can get a bit cramped. Car sex is hot, steamy, and also bumpy. You may think the idea is good at the time but you will wake up the next morning with some bruises that the seat belt left on the small of your back. A car is such a place of retreat for those that do not have their own space other than a vehicle. Most people have roommates that they live with or children depending on the season of life they are in. A car is a place that they can make out freely with their partner and no one is around to judge or walk-in on them, like when they are at home.
A fun innocent night out at the local fair can get pretty risque when left to its own devices. I don’t know what it is about ferris wheels and cotton candy but something about the carnies get people’s juices flowing because a carnival is a very common awkward place that couples have sex for the first time. Part of the reason is just that in the summer months a carnival or local fair are a top date location for teens and young adults. With that being said, although very public a carnival is in fact so crowded that it is almost private in a way because other people are not paying attention to you. Sneaking behind the tilt-a-whirl or having a quickie on the ferris wheel is not uncommon at all. Awkward, yes. Convenient, even more yes.
Whether it is a roof of a large building or a roof of a house or apartment complex someone has probably had sex there. The roof is an awkward place to have sex for the first time because of the height as to which you are having sex. I would not be able to think about the sex that is happening I would be thinking, oh my God, I am going to roll off this roof to my death and if the fall doesn’t kill me the man that is inside me will surely crush me as we both fall. Yes, that is an unrealistic and cryptic take on the situation but it does cross people’s minds and that is why it is such an awkward place to have sex. Don’t get me started about the angles. If you are on a work building roof it is more likely to be enjoyable because it is a cement and flat surface similar to any situation. But houses have slants, and angles that can make things tricky but also that much more exhilarating.
Splash! Being in a swimsuit is as close to public nudity as you will get, legally. It is only natural that you would begin to get a sexy feeling and want to jump your date’s bones. But, there is one problem..lube.
“Lubrication. Water will quickly dissipate the natural lubricants the bodies make. It needs to be supplemented with something else, usually a silicone-based lube.”
The sounds will make it awkward, there is a weird whooshing that happens when you have water sex. You don’t want your date thinking that you make these awkward sounds when you have “regular” sex. I would not recommend pool sex for your first time with someone. Keep it land-based, sex can be weird the first time anyways so don’t make it worse.
Public bathrooms are gross. But porta-johns are like next-level gross.
“Mine was in a porta-john in the middle of a park. Neither of us could wait to find a less…shitty site to do the deed, and it was the only place where we could go without getting caught/arrested. We were both teenagers at the time and extremely horny, so it seemed like a great idea.” -Reddit user
I feel like any bathroom would be an undesirable place to have sex but to have sex in a porta-john is awkward. That smells, how could someone enjoy that? The stench is unbearable just when you go in to do your business let alone to do someone else. YUCK!
Closed after dark to kids but open after dark to horny teenagers and vagrants. The park after dark is a much different crowd once the baby wearing dads, and organic mamas have left the premises. A park is a nice and awkward open space to fall into a sexy evening. You could be walking in the park or strolling around the neighborhood and find yourself “feeling it” and the nearest place is the tire swing…Things are going to get weird. But when you want to you want to and there is not much stopping a hot blooded couple in heat. There is the slide, the swings, or even the bridge you cross that connects the jungle gym. Whatever your flavor is none of this will go smoothly, especially if it is your first time together. Just like the carnival, it is public but private.
You catch eyes across the chocolate fountain at your Holiday work party. You can’t leave with him because then everyone would know you were up to something. A weird code is exchanged and both of you at different times meet-up in the dark conference room and start having sex on top of the conference table.
Sometimes Weird Is Good
Sex is great but timing is everything in order to reduce the awkward level in location. But it is not always awkward when it happens. You may think, yes the public restroom of this club is dirty and awkward and the sink is all wet and now so am I. But it can also be hot because anyone could walk in on you, there is a mirror for you to check out your positions, and when you get up and leave to go back in the club you feel exhilarated about what just went down.
“With the right person and the right mood, sex anywhere can feel pretty darn thrilling. That said, getting it on in a particularly extraordinary place has a way of heightening the experience.”