The greatest instrument you can use to attract another person is with conversation. One does not simply speak, you must carefully orchestrate the oratory skills that you use when engaging in a conversation with someone. The idea of a “pick-up line” is cheesy but there are eloquent ways that can start a conversation to win over the person that you are trying to date. Think of conversation skills as another part of your ensemble. Do your hair, dress-up nice, fresh breath, and a mind full of conversation starters and engaging anecdotes.
Think of your profile as an a conversation opener. Your profile is the first line of attack when interacting with new people on dating sites. They see this before they even talk to you. Make sure that you have fun and simple answers to profile questions and do not try too hard. The better your profile is, the better chance you have with initiating a positive conversation. Here is an example of a profile that works:
I’ll admit it, I’m a little old-fashioned when it comes to my dating style. I open doors and like to go for drinks AND dinner on the first date. But it’s all part of what makes me a gentleman. I’m looking for someone who is always up for life’s adventures but doesn’t mind staying in and watching a movie when the weather calls for it. I’m a sucker for dogs. I rescued a lab a few years back and we’ve been best pals ever since. I try to eat healthy but I have a major weakness for pizza. Let me know if you want to go get a slice!
Once you have created a proper opener in your profile the next step is to understand what to say when you actually talk with the person in a conversation. Icebreakers sound like a tool that you use at a corporate retreat. There are some that are not as “cheesy” when it comes to dating. There are four categories of icebreakers and you should only use funny and romantic. Leave the weak ones for work room chats.
“Where did you grow up?”
This one is weak because you can find this out in their profile and it is not very open ended. They can answer, Baltimore and that’s that.
“Why did your last relationship end? Please answer in a limerick.”
Clearly you are not actually expecting them to break out in song. But this is a fun joke to start up a fun conversation that can go on for hours.
No matter what you say, keep eye contact. Eye contact means you are listening and nothing is more romantic than that.
All in all conversation starters are the gateway to a good relationship. Start off in a good place and it will only go great from there. Don’t forget that conversation is a craft and there is no shame in researching and practicing, just like you would anything else.
Once you feel ready to start talking follow us here on Medium @hilyapp and join Hily here to start meeting local singles today!